For anyone, reading and understanding the title of this column is pretty impossible. The reason is plain – I just closed my eyes and pressed random keys, so it makes absolutely no sense to anyone. Why? Because I wanted to make a clear illustration of my point: If a person doesn’t use words that are clear and easily understood by the reader, then why bother? Why am I talking about this? Here is my reason. If I write and no one understands my sentences and therefore my thoughts, then I have accomplished nothing. In fact, less than nothing. I have wasted my column space, my time and yours, and insulted you. I did some online researching today before I started typing, and here are the facts. Today’s average adult in our country reads on an eighth-grade level. Eighth grade. So given this truth, why in the world would I want to use language that exceeds those levels? To impress? To educate? To irritate? To confuse? That would be stupid on my part. If I am wanting my reader to understand what I am trying to say, then I need to be smart enough to use language we both understand. And yes, I am addressing teachers, ministers, spouses, parents, teens, kids, bosses, and anyone else who needs to communicate with people on this planet. People, there is no way to understand, teach, agree, obey or argue with you, if you are not communicating plainly. How many jobs have been lost by this problem? How many divorces are on the books? How many teens have been lost to their families? How many companies have gone down the drain? All because the people involved have not communicated well with each other. Ministers can preach about a relationship with the Creator until they are blue in the face, but if they are not using language that the listener understands, they have accomplished little. Parents can lecture their kids about their bad conduct, their low school grades, and the inevitable consequences until the proverbial cows come home – but if their words don’t convey love, concern, and real discipline, then nothing is accomplished. Except contributing to rebellion on the teen’s part, probably. Endless books can be written by authors who have a stream of PHDs behind their name, but if their lofty and worthy ideas are not understandable by the reader – then why write? Oh yes, I do know that there are books that have to be written for the waaayyyy-above average reader. Physicians need to educate other doctors on new methods and techniques, ministers need to teach theology to Bible students, college professors have to challenge their students. But that is not the average Joe or Joleen. The Joes and Joleens of us simply need to make certain we are understood when we are speaking, writing, or conveying with our body language. Otherwise, we are simply blowing hot air, and wasting each other’s time. And risking the harm that comes with miscommunicating.

By Kara Kimbrough King Charles just can't win. As the cameras rolled last Saturday on Coronation Day, he threw a tantrum while seated in his gold carriage on Coronation Day. Professional lipreaders say he testily shouted, "This is boring!" as he cooled his heels in the gold pumpkin. Turns out, Prince William and his wife were late in arriving with their children. As a result, the royal couple was forced to enter Westminster Abbey ahead of his much more photogenic son and daughter-in-law. The Wales' grand entrance with cute kids in tow upstaged the stodgy future King and his wife (sorry, I just can't call her queen). But this wasn't the only blunder of the weeklong build-up to the heralded Coronation Day. The King - or at least, the palace chef, released a special recipe ahead of the big day called "Coronation Quiche." To say it was downright horrid would be an understatement. The British aren't known for their fine cuisine, but this was ridiculous, even for them. According to chefs around the world who tried, unsuccessfully, to make a dish worthy of serving, the end result was a soggy, tasteless mess. Turns out, the palace's version produced a soft, not firm crust, runny sauce and tasteless, inedible toppings. To save the day, another English chef modified the recipe and reintroduced it, receiving much better reviews. All the negative publicity about the world's worst quiche brought to mind a statement I'd heard decades ago: "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche." I thought former Commissioner of Agriculture Jim Buck Ross had uttered the famous words. A little research proved it was the title of a book written years ago about the stereotypes often assigned to men. The incorrigible Ross' famous statement, "Down here, men don't cook!" was actually uttered in the early 1980's to Geraldine Ferraro, then-running mate to Presidential candidate Walter Mondale. While bragging about Mississippi's prolific blueberry crops, he asked her if she could bake a blueberry muffin. She shot back, "I sure can- can you?" Ross then famously uttered the lines that immediately hit the national airwaves - and not exactly in a favorable way. Capitalizing on the furor over Ross' statement, Mississippians Carol Taff and Linda Ross Aldy put it on the cover of a cookbook containing recipes from well-known Mississippi men like Trent Lott, Thad Cochran and others. Published reports say recipes included barbecued chicken, hush puppies and wild game. However, I was surprised to learn about one omission -a recipe for blueberry muffins. Back to quiche - it's not a dish of which I'm fond. I just don't understand the point. If there's a crust situation going on, I want to taste tangy apples, sugar and cinnamon...maybe lemon filling and meringue...or even better, sugary custard topped with crispy cooked pecans. Not baked eggs, bacon pieces or vegetable slices, the filling of most quiches. Call me a purist, but I've never been a fan of those baked breakfast dishes in which eggs, bacon or sausage and some type of bread are combined, then baked into a thick, dense dish. Just give me fried (very well done) eggs, crispy bacon and crisp, buttered toast topped with homemade jelly. And yes, I want each item to occupy separate, distinct areas on the plate. The same goes for a dish called spaghetti pie. I love pie...I adore spaghetti...but don't combine the two. Give me a bowl of pasta topped with tomato sauce, meat sauce or meatballs. Or a combination of all three. I just don't care to compress it into a pie plate and slice it like a pie. Why...just why? All this talk about quiche, pies, coronations, and impatient British kings caused me to unearth a cookbook a friend brought me from England. I'd planned to include a recipe, but after scrolling the list of steak and kidney pie, bubble and squeak, Eton mess and rice pudding, I decided to pass. Instead, I'm sharing an incredibly simple, but utterly delicious recipe for a dish that's part pie, part cake, a little like cobbler and unlike Coronation Quiche, 100% American - and amazing! Fruit Pie/Cake/Cobbler 1 bag Pepperidge Farm Chessmen Cookies 1 can blueberry pie filling 1 can lemon pie filling 1 box Lemon Supreme cake mix 1-1/2 sticks butter Arrange a single layer of cookies, sides touching, on the bottom of a 13x9 inch baking dish. Spread blueberry filling on top with a spatula, followed by a layer of lemon filling. Spread dry cake mix on top - do not mix everything together. Top with thin slices of butter, then bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes. Cut into squares. Kara Kimbrough is a food and travel writer from Mississippi. Email her at kkprco@yahoo.com.

New Stage Theatre will present the musical Ring of Fire: The Music of Johnny Cash May 30 - June 11. Curtain times and dates for performances are Tuesdays through Saturdays at 7:30 p.m. and 2:00 p.m. on Sundays. Ticket prices are $40.00 with discounts available for students, senior citizens, military, and groups. Tickets can be purchased at the box office, charged by phone by calling the theatre at (601) 948-3533, or ordered online at www.newstagetheatre.com. This production is sponsored by Blue Cross & Blue Shield of Mississippi, BankPlus, and The Dorsey J. Barefield Charitable Trust. Security will be provided. Recommended for ages 10 and up. From the iconic songbook of Johnny Cash comes this unique musical about love and faith, struggle and success, rowdiness and redemption, and home and family. More than two dozen classic hits—including “I Walk the Line,” “A Boy Named Sue,” “Folsom Prison Blues,” and the title tune—paint a musical portrait of The Man in Black that promises to be a foot-stompin’, crowd-pleasin’ salute to a unique musical legend! "This is, without question, the best ensemble I have ever had the good fortune to assemble for this show," says Director Chris 'Red' Blisset who has directed Ring of Fire eight times at various other theatres throughout the country. "I can hardly believe how lucky we are to have this mix of world-class professionals from Mississippi and New York. Some days I want to stop rehearsal and get their autographs they're so good. Seriously, come see this show; if you don't like it, I'll pay you back myself - I'm the red-headed guy," jokes Blisset. “Ring of Fire is a fantastic crowd pleasing show and is perfect as the closer for our 57th season," says Artistic Director Francine Thomas Reynolds. "I am thrilled that Chris “Red” Blisset is returning to New Stage not only as a performer but, this time, as the Director/Music Director for the show. He has assembled a very exciting and skilled group of performers. With everyone playing multiple instruments, audiences will be amazed and delighted with the musical talent of every one on the stage.” The cast includes: Rheanna Atendido* (New York), Chris 'Red' Blisset*(New York), Ben Clark*(New York), Trevor Lindley Craft (New York), Andrew Dillon (Jackson), Jennifer Smith (Clinton), Claire-Frances Sullivan (New York), Jayla Lomax (Jackson), Ryan Bergman (Gulfport). *Rheanna Atendido, Chris 'Red' Blisset, and Ben Clark appear through the courtesy of Actors’ Equity Association. PAY WHAT YOU CAN NIGHT: Patrons can come to the box office beginning at 6:30 on Wednesday, May 31, 2023. If tickets are available they can be purchased at any value with cash, check, or credit card ($5 minimum is required if using a credit card). This offer is only valid for the May 31 performance. YOUTH NIGHTS: Youth 18 and under can reserve $15 tickets for the performance on Friday, June 2, 2023. This discount is only available by calling the box office and mentioning “youth night” for the discount. STUDENT RUSH DISCOUNT: One hour prior to curtain for any performance, students with a current academic ID may purchase an available seat for $10. Limit one ticket per ID. Where: 1100 Carlisle Street, Jackson MS 39202 Dates: Open: May 30, 2023; Close: June 11, 2023 Performance Times: Tuesday thru Saturday: 7:30 pm; Sundays: 2:00 pm Tickets: $40; $35 seniors/students/military Box Office: Telephone: 601-948-3533 Online: www.newstagetheatre.com Email: tickets@newstagetheatre.com Hours: Monday-Friday from 10 a.m. – 5 p.m. Hours During Show: Tuesday thru Friday: 10 am - 7:00 pm Saturday: 4 pm - 7:00 pm; Sunday: 1 pm - 2 pm Tickets Online: Tickets may be purchased 24 hours a day, seven days a week at www.newstagetheatre.com (a per-ticket service fee of $3 applies to all online purchases) Production Information: Director Chris 'Red' Blisset Associate Music Director Trevor Lindley Craft Costume Designer Caleb Blackwell Lighting Designer Annalise Caudle Scenic Designer Cody Stockstill Sound Designer/Engineer Alberto Meza Properties Designer Jenna Kahley Production Stage Manager Peppy Biddy* Assistant Stage Manager Mattea Pierce Production Manager Clara Seitz Lead Electrician Matthew McMurtry Carpenter Dave Ellis Production Associate Antonio Juarez Production Assistant Darby Frost Assistant Costumer Nina Frost Scenic Painter Michael Montgomery

By Bob Garver In between “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3” (Star-)lording over the competition and “Fast X” running over anything in its path comes “Book Club: The Next Chapter.” This film’s marketing department looked at a lineup of second-tier holidays and noticed that nothing was opening the weekend of Mother’s Day, so this got slotted in. It’s as good a release strategy as any – it’s not like there was some better weekend to release this dreck - but I fear the only bonding children will be doing with their mothers while watching this movie is commiserating over how stupid it is. I did not watch the entirety of “Book Club” from 2018, but I did catch some highlights to prepare for this film. The premise was that a group of four female friends all read “Fifty Shades of Grey” and were inspired to take some initiative in their lives. Widow Diane (Diane Keaton) decided that it was okay to pursue a relationship with Mitchell (Andy Garcia). Married Carol (Mary Steenbergen) rekindled her romance with husband Bruce (Craig T. Nelson). Divorcee Sharon (Candace Bergen) decided to give online dating an open-ended try. And maneater Vivian (Jane Fonda) decided that old flame Arthur (Don Johnson) was Mr. Right. In the time between movies, Diane has moved in with Mitchell, Carol lost her restaurant to the pandemic (and nearly lost Bruce to a heart attack), Sharon retired from her federal judgeship, and most importantly, Vivian accepted a marriage proposal from Arthur. The ladies go to Italy for an elaborate bachelorette party. They go shopping, crack PG-13-friendly sex jokes, and practically deplete the country of its wine supply. I don’t think money or expense is mentioned once. In fact, the entire movie seems like little more than an excuse for the cast and crew to enjoy Italy themselves, a theory confirmed by the vacation-y photos that play over the credits. Inconvenience finally rears its head when the group’s bags get stolen. The ashes of Diane’s husband were in that bag, as she had planned to spread them on the trip. Other storylines include Sharon having a fling with a philosophy professor (Hugh Quarshie, admittedly the movie’s best surprise – the main can sing!) and running afoul of a local police officer (Vincent Riotta), Carol meeting up with an old boyfriend (Giancarlo Giannini), and Vivian questioning if she wants to go through with the marriage. I know the movie is ostensibly about the bachelorette party, but let’s just say this isn’t the kind of movie that doesn’t end with a gorgeous destination wedding. The movie is essentially a cross between “Sex and the City” and “Mamma Mia!” (readers expecting me to compare it to another movie, I’m getting there, I assure you) with all the wealth/travel porn and gentle sexual humor. Some of the jokes are truly painful. A typical scene: A waiter tells Carol, “The chef would like to show you his cucina.” “His ‘what?’” Anybody with common sense can tell that he means “kitchen” based on context, but not the characters in this movie. That’s why it doesn’t work nearly as well as “80 for Brady.” I take back what I said earlier about there not being a better weekend for “Book Club: The Next Chapter.” A better weekend would be one far, far, removed from that similar film – at least six months away instead of three. It’s not so much that there’s only room for one movie about four senior women (one of whom is played by Jane Fonda), it’s that the other movie was so funny and heartfelt that it draws even more attention to the laziness of this one. I hope you all had a happy Mother’s Day and did something more fulfilling than seeing this lousy movie. Grade: C- “Book Club: The Next Chapter” is rated PG-13 for some strong language and suggestive material. Its running time is 107 minutes. Contact Bob Garver at rrg251@nyu.edu.

The Alumni Jubilee Singers, under the direction of Dr. Bobby Cooper, will present a concert on June 11, 3:00 PM at St. Mary’s Episcopal Church in Bolton. The concert will be featured in conjunction with the Eucharist celebrated by The Rev. David Elliott III. In 1972, Dr. Cooper arrived on the Utica Campus of Hinds Community College to join the music faculty as choral director. One of his first goals was to revive the musical style of the Jubilee Singers who achieved national fame in the 1900s for the Utica Normal and Industrial Institute. In order to help raise money for the fledgling Institute, the singers took long and arduous trips to northern cities to give concerts to raise money. During their travels, they cut numerous recordings for the Victor record label. Dr. Cooper discovered the exciting history of the Jubilee Singers and made it his goal to revive the original arrangements that were kept in safe storage. By the late 1970s, Dr. Cooper and the revived Jubilee Singers had achieved state-wide and national acclaim, much like the original Jubilee Singers. In 2018, after an amazing 45-year tenure at the Utica Branch, Dr. Cooper achieved the reputation as the longest-serving faculty member at Hinds Community College. He loved his students and he loved making music. Under his baton the world was overflowing with the Sound of Music. The public is invited to attend the concert and reception to follow.

The Salvation Army Jackson Metro Area is excited to announce “A Night with the Mississippi Braves” fundraiser on Saturday, June 10th at Trustmark Park. This exciting event will feature a baseball game between the Mississippi Braves and the Biloxi Shuckers, with gates opening at 5:00pm and game starting at 6:05pm. Attendees can stick around after the game for a firework display. Additionally, The Salvation Army Women’s Auxiliary will have “Cooking with Grace” cookbooks and themed “buy-it-now” baskets available for purchase, and the Mississippi Braves will have an auction, with all proceeds going to The Salvation Army Jackson Metro Area. This event is organized by The Salvation Army Women’s Auxiliary and promises to be a night of entertainment and fundraising. “This event is a great opportunity to have fun and show your support for The Salvation Army’s important work in the community,” said Arlette Thompson, President of The Salvation Army Jackson Women’s Auxiliary. “We’re grateful to the Mississippi Braves for their partnership in helping us raise funds to support our programs and services.” Ticket vouchers will be available to purchase for $10 for field level and can be purchased at give.salvationarmyalm.org/event/night-with-the-braves/e487611. Who: The Salvation Army Jackson When: Saturday, June 10, 2023 5:00pm – Gates Open 6:05pm – Game Starts Where: Trustmark Park 1 Braves Blvd, Pearl, MS 39208

CASA Mississippi is proud to announce the opening of CASA of Hinds County, its new Court-Appointed Special Advocates (CASA) program which will serve children in the Hinds County foster care system. CASA of Hinds County is the newest member of the National Court-Appointed Special Advocate/Guardian ad Litem Association for Children, a nationwide network of 940 programs that recruit, train, and support volunteers who advocate for the best interest of children who have been abused or neglected. CASA volunteers are appointed by judges to provide a voice for children who are in the foster care system or whose families are at risk of court involvement. They work to ensure children receive the necessary services and support to help them thrive and find a safe, permanent home. “We are thrilled to bring CASA to Hinds County, which currently has approximately 185 children in the foster care system,” said Laura Gee, Executive Director of CASA of Hinds County. “Our goal is to provide a voice for every child in foster care who needs one. With the support of dedicated volunteers from our community, we can help these children navigate the complex child welfare system and ensure that they receive the services and support they need to thrive.” CASA of Hinds County will recruit and train volunteers from the local community to serve as advocates for these vulnerable children. The program will work in collaboration with local child welfare agencies, attorneys, and judges to ensure that the children's needs are met, and their voices are heard. Individuals interested in volunteering can learn more at www.casaofhindscounty.org

Ducks and people. You begin comparing male and female ducks to us human counterparts, and you will find a drastic difference. And I’m not referring to our non-webbed feet and wings. One cold morning, we bundled ourselves up in warm jackets and began the one-mile walking trail that encircled a little local lake. Outdoors walking versus an exercise machine in a stuffy hotel exercise room? No contest. As we walked, we watched a male and female duck gliding contentedly around their watery home. And I began noticing some real differences between us and them. The male duck was absolutely gorgeous. His head was a deep beautiful green, his breast glinted bright red in the sunlight, and his back was covered in blue green feathers. Oh yeah, one good-lookin’ male. God sure guaranteed he would attract the attention of a female. Ah. Now, the female. The one swimming beside this gleaming, glossy, attention-garnering male. Well, she was the exact opposite. No spark of deep jewel tones anywhere. Drab, mousy-colored shades of brown, buff and black feathers covered her head and body. Not exactly the stuff of dreams for the average human female, who usually likes to be attractive as possible. And yet, that was exactly how God made this female duck, and He called her perfect. So. My tongue-in-cheek question is this; Why in the world do many human females decide, unlike the female duck, to do everything possible to be gorgeous? Or maybe we don’t decide this at all, maybe it was put in our DNA by our Creator. Our Creator: “I’m gonna create human ladies so that from the day they hit puberty, a lot of them are gonna glance in the mirror and gasp, “Oh my gosh, I am so plain! My hair color is so ugly! And this face! I have got to get lipstick, and eyeshadow, and blush, and mascara, and eyeliner, or I can never step foot out of this house again!” Oh, I know, some are not born with that particular gene that makes women want to ‘gussie up.’ Those ladies are totally at peace with the au natural image looking back at them in the mirror every day. Neither way is wrong or right. It is simply a matter of being true to yourself, to what you enjoy. But in whichever category you land, Gussie or non-Gussie, I encourage you – love being you. There will never be another you. Your Creator made you and said, “For all eternity, I am totally happy and content with having only one of that particular lady.” So, whether you are one who loves constantly changing styles in clothes and makeup, or are just the opposite - be confident in being YOU. Happy Mother’s Day to all the gussied-up moms and the al natural moms among us.

United States Representative Bennie G. Thompson (D-MS) announced The National Science Foundation has awarded $500,000 to Jackson State University. This project, entitled "Excellence in Research: Spontaneous Nucleation Strategy for High-Quality Perovskite Films" is under the direction of Dai Qilin. This Excellence in Research (EiR) project addresses the use of volatile solvents to prepare high-efficiency perovskite solar cells by a non-antisolvent method. The proposed research method exhibits significant potential in the fabrication of high-quality perovskite films because the film growth is caused by solvent volatilization via a spontaneously and simultaneously supersaturated nucleation strategy. For more information call Dai Qilin at (601)979-2008.

By Kara Kimbrough Retracting last week's statement proclaiming spring is the perfect time to grill may be necessary. When temperatures rose to the mid-80s this week, all pleasant grilling conditions disappeared. In my defense, technically, it is still spring. Despite the heat, Memorial Day is on the way whether we're prepared for it or not. And we still have to eat. My only advice: serving cool, fresh salads are one way to beat the heat and keep things light at any Memorial Day meal, regardless of the temperature. When it comes to potato salad, nothing compares to Mama Hamil's creamy, chunky version. Thankfully, the popular Madison family-style restaurant offers large containers of its delicious salad for take-out. If you'd prefer to make it yourself, drop me an email and I'll send a recipe similar to theirs. Here are the recipes for three other favorite salads, guaranteed to keep your Memorial Day dining cool, light and delicious. Totally Easy Tortellini Salad 2 (14-ounce) packages frozen cheese tortellini 2 bell peppers (1 green, 1 red), diced 2 stalks celery, diced 1 (14-ounce) can artichoke hearts, drained 1 (8-ounce) bottle creamy Caesar salad dressing Prepare tortellini according to package directions and drain. Rinse with cold water, drain and chill. Combine tortellini, bell peppers, celery, artichoke hearts and dressing in large bowl. Add ground black pepper and other seasonings to taste. Cover and refrigerate at least 2 hours before serving. Marinated Corn Salad 3 (15-ounce) can shoepeg or whole kernel corn, drained 1 red bell pepper, chopped 1 cup chopped celery 1/2 cup chopped onion 2 Roma tomatoes, diced 1 (8-ounce) bottle Italian dressing In a bowl with a lid, combine vegetables, then pour in bottle of dressing. Close container and shake well. Refrigerate overnight or at least several hours before serving. Seafood Salad Extraordinaire 2 cups cooked seafood (shrimp, crabmeat (can use imitation) or a combination of both 1/2 cup French dressing (more to taste) 1-1/2 freshly finely grated onion 1/2 cup finely grated green pepper 1/2 cup finely grated celery 1 tablespoon fresh dill 2 teaspoons lemon juice 1/2 teaspoon Old Bay seasoning 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper 1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce 1 cup mayonnaise In a large bowl, combine seafood with all ingredients except mayonnaise and eggs. Mix well and refrigerate 30 minutes. Stir in mayo and chill for another 30 minutes to allow flavors to meld. Kara Kimbrough is a food and travel writer from Mississippi. Email her at kkprco@yahoo.com.

By Bob Garver The Guardians of the Galaxy were the goofballs of the Marvel Cinematic Universe before “everyone” wanted to be the goofballs of the MCU. The first film from 2014 pulled off the unlikely feat of introducing five new, disparate, uniquely funny heroes and making fans care about all of them. The original lineup was human Peter “Star-Lord” Quill (Chris Pratt), the anthropomorphic Rocket Raccoon (Bradley Cooper), living tree Groot (Vin Diesel), green assassin Gamora (Zoe Saldaña), and blue powerhouse Drax the Destroyer (Dave Bautista). Since then, the team has taken on Quill’s half-sister Mantis (Pom Klementieff), Gamora’s adoptive sister Nebula (Karen Gillen), displaced pirate Kraglin (Sean Gunn), and even Soviet space dog Cosmo (Maria Bakalova). They also lost Gamora at the hands of her own adoptive father Thanos, but a past version of the character traveled through time, so she’s still around, but doesn’t remember being part of the team, nor does she want to be. The new adventure kicks off when Rocket is attacked by Adam Warlock (Will Poulter), the newly-created “son” of the vindictive High Priestess Ayesha (Elizabeth Debicki) of the Sovereign race, who wants revenge on Rocket for stealing from her back in “Vol. 2.” And Adam just goes right on the attack, driving the small target through a wall at first sight. It’s a nice change of pace from recent MCU outings where the villain tries to introduce themselves dramatically and the hero makes fun of them (looking at you, M.O.D.A.K.). Rocket can’t be healed without information about his artificial biology, so Star-Lord leads a mission to his furry friend’s planet of origin to steal his records. Gamora, now a space pirate, comes along, but only because she’s promised a fee. Star-Lord knows the mission is about helping Rocket, but he can’t help but get distracted by the possibility that spending time with Gamora will make her fall in love with him again. She’s not receptive to the idea. Rocket, meanwhile, is forced to confront his traumatic past through a series of coma dreams. He started off as a normal, non-talking raccoon, but was given a series of painful technological upgrades by the High Evolutionary (Chukwudi Iwuji) as part of an effort to create a sort of master race. He was best friends with his fellow tortured test subjects, otter Lylla (Linda Cardellini), walrus Teefs (Asim Chaudhry), and rabbit Floor (Michaela Hoover). The team made a pact to stay together, and we haven’t seen these other characters before, so… don’t get too attached to them in these flashbacks. Ah, but how can you not? That High Evolutionary is as sick and cruel as he is megalomaniacal. He’s the kind of heel I want to see kept alive in the MCU just so he can be punished more down the line. The Rocket scenes and later ones with the High Evolutionary’s exploits are true tear-jerkers, but the tone, as always, is mostly humorous. I got some good laughs out of Mantis expressing shock at how long humans live, Star-Lord failing to sweet-talk a receptionist, and Drax negotiating the number of people he can kill on the mission. It all adds up to a highly entertaining first two-thirds. Then I started feeling the length of the movie: the jokes got less funny, the characters and their individual storylines got too crowded and confusing, and the movie certainly wasn’t retaining its appeal with its visually-mushy, commonplace-for-MCU action scenes. After a string of disappointments, the MCU has given us a decent outing with “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3,” but I’m still waiting for that special movie that reminds me of why it’s the biggest franchise in the (known) galaxy. Grade: B- “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3” is rated PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action, strong language (including the MCU’s first unbleeped F-bomb, which I think is wasted here), suggestive/drug references and thematic elements. Its running time is 150 minutes. Contact Bob Garver at rrg251@nyu.edu.

Susie and her older sister went for a walk on the country road near her home. As they stepped onto the arched bridge that spanned a rushing creek, Susie stopped midstride. Her sister, not realizing she was now alone on the bridge, just kept walking and talking about the grim problems they each faced in life. Susie had brought along a long rope with one end tied securely around her waist, the rest looped over her shoulder. Taking the rope in her hands, she walked up to her sister and held out the other end of the long rope. “Here, hold this for me,” she said glumly. Not a word of explanation, just the short, terse request. When the other woman reached out in surprise and took the rope end, Susie turned on her heel and walked over to the side of the bridge. She climbed up on the short railing as her sister watched in confusion. And then, before her sister could react to what she was seeing, Susie simply leaned forward and fell as far the rope around her waist would allow. As she dangled there in mid-air, high above the foaming water and huge boulders, her sister rushed to the railing, screaming in panic for Susie. She struggled to not let Susie fall to her death, but the rope was slowly slipping thru her hands and creating deep, painful burns. Short of breath, and terrified she couldn’t hold on much longer, the older sister screamed “Susie, what are you doing?!!!” But Susie wasn’t struggling or pleading for help, she was just calmly and limply hanging there. She then looked up and said quietly, “Just hold the rope for me, sis. Just hold the rope.” No explanation, just, “Hold the rope, sis. Just hold on to the rope.” Inexplicable behavior, isn’t it? But if you have ever found yourself in a relationship with someone who has decided to figuratively hand you one end of their rope, leap over the side of the bridge and just simply hang there – then you can identify with the older sister. The Susie in your life has made you the keeper of her rope and refuses to help herself. ‘Trapped’ doesn’t even begin to describe your feelings. You know exactly how that sister felt. So what do you do, when your Susie is just hanging out and you are hanging on for dear life – with deepening burns on your hands? You’re feeling like you can’t just walk away and live your life, ‘cause you have to stand there - holding her rope. Realize that this situation is what your Susie has chosen. Realize you are not accountable for her predicament - she is. Realize you have the right, and the responsibility to tell her that you will no longer hold her rope. Make your Susie – not you - take responsibility for the choices and lifestyle that she picked. Choices. We all make them, good and bad..